Little Winter Ways: April 2020

So here we still are...firmly in lockdown...

My heart is growing cold for all the Covid19 talk and restrictions...

Work has to continue...

Shopping can continue...

But family life....sadly not so.

It hasn't helped that our internet has been very poor...

I am currently awaiting an engineer to phone me back...

Without the power of wi fi calling I am not hopeful of him getting through...

I am a much more spiritual person than religious...

However I am silently praying that Boris will begin to relax the lockdown so that we can see small numbers of our family soon...

I am really worried about what effect this is having on young Henry...

He has been found by his parents in the middle of the night wedged under his bed...

He used to sleep soundly throughout the night.

He also has developed eczma...I've not known him to suffer previously.

Oscar I am less concerned about...

But Henry...

Our weather has turned...as was inevitable...

I cannot recall such a lovely April...

Or maybe I can...and it was then followed by a non Summer!

We are going to need some Summer this year for sure.

Housework has almost become my salvation.

A routine of sorts...

Washing...and more washing...

But familiarity non the less.

I have managed to obtain some bread flour...

Not my usual but lovely all the same...

Yesterday I almost burnt a sponge...

Good thing hubby likes things 'well done'...

My creativity is about set to zero at the moment...

I have no drive or enthusiasm for anything...

I know I must go to work later...and when I get there I know it will be alright...

But I can feel my spark leaving me...

Little by little each day...

Flames need oxygen to continue burning...

And my heart needs family time...

Walks with Heidi have been short this week...

She literally wants to cross the road...pee on the grass, then head for home again.

My walks have thus been reduced also.

Rain doesn't necessarily stop me, but we have had a biting wind.

I love the look of a stormy sky at this time of year...

But prefer to gaze at it through a window!

The woodburner has come into its own again these past few days...

I find it a great source of comfort.

Don't get me wrong...

I know we're all in this together...

But it is hard...

And I am finding it hard having to be physically close to so many people...

Just none of my family.

Soon I keep telling myself...

Soon we shall reunite...

I may even wish to retreat for some alone time...

But right now all I want is a sticky fingered...possibly snotty cuddle from a toddler...

How many things will no longer be important I wonder when all this is over...

How many shops will stay shut forever...

How many people will have become conditioned to live like hermits...

Will I appreciate our local beaches more...

Will I order as many takeaways as before...

Questions questions which only time will tell...

Go on...make a wish...

I have just wished that the internet will allow me to upload this post!

Blessings, J. x

Well where to begin after this lengthy absence. Life has been anything but normal for us or the entire World of late has it. How one tiny organism could ever know it had caused so much disruption, mayhem and misery to so many people. Yes our days come and go...the sun still rises in the morning and sets in the evening, the moon comes out at night...but what lies between is no longer the harmonious life we once knew. If only we had known how free our lives were and how blessed we were before lockdown became more, so much more than a mere threat. If only we had treasured each interaction with our friends and family instead of being guilty of sometimes looking ahead at what needed to be done, what needed to be got ready for the next day...how I wish we had had the ability to just live in the moment a little more. I hope I never forget this feeling and treasure my nearest and dearest that little bit more when all this is over.

For my husband and myself both in jobs that need to continue through this awful time the first week of lockdown passed in a strange blur...with my working in the care sector we made a few changes at home. The washing machine was relocated indoors near the back door, so that as soon as I return from work in go my things...likewise with husbands' things. It's a case of strip and run through the cottage! A couple of people in the home I work for became sick, no tests were done, though we had to treat them as positive cases regardless...One sadly passed and then was tested as negative, we believe that at the moment the home residents and all our home care clients are not carrying the virus but realise that that could and is likely to change. We have strict...and I mean strict protocols for hand washing and getting changed at work, the use of PPE...how we enter and leave the premesis...yes it is a one way system. Despite all these measures, on the Friday evening of the first week of lockdown I managed to fall sound asleep before I had even prepared our pudding, let alone eaten it...when I woke up I had a strange rather dry cough. At first I dismissed it...after all it couldn't be IT...however the next morning I woke with the same dry cough, feeling rather poorly, hot and cold, and with a strange tightness across my chest. Hubby was clearly not impressed at the prospect of having to stay home for up to two weeks because of me...and at first tried telling me that I couldn't have it as I could still smell and taste things. Sometimes hubbys can be rather silly...mine included. By the Saturday evening however he to had started to cough and feel shivery and was saying that his chest also felt tight. It was at this moment he told me that actually he'd had a bit of a dry throat for a couple of days but had put it down to me having changed our tea bag brand...bless his cottons...he had topped up the tea tin in the week. I quickly challanged this theory as I had in fact changed brands of tea around Christmas time. So we were in it together. Coughing...running hot and cold and me mostly struggling with breathing mainly when I tried to talk. Hubby recovered reasonably quickly and was more than ready to go back to work on the Monday following his seven day isolation. I however was having one good day where I didn't need paracetamol followed by one where I felt weak and rubbish, so ended up having two weeks off work. I think it's fair to say that day ten was the last one on which I needed paracetamol. By the Wednesday I allowed myself to go on short dog walks down the deserted lane. At first I didn't have the energy to venture into the woods and when I did I didn't go too far. It has taken a good while to get my strength back, and I still go to bed early but I'm definitely getting there.

This past Monday I went back to work. At first apprehensive but glad to be back and wanting to do my bit for these poor helpless souls who are no longer allowed vistis from their nearest and dearest.

Daughter and son in law and our two grandsons were at the point of their entire chain being able to exchange contracts with everyone except we're not sure about our neighbour as she says they haven't been able to do the buyers survey on the property she is buying, though we are hoping as it's virtually next door to her daughter that she will move in with her for a while if necessary. If they get an opportunity I really don't think the rest of the chain will want to miss it or be hanging about. Oh how I really wish their move could happen soon...just to hear little Henry playing in the garden would lift my spirits no end. It is so hard at the moment.

So with the lovely weather we have slightly heavy hearts...hubby really took a dive at the weekend and ended up suffering a reasonably severe bout of indigestion. He felt tight in his chest and panicked that it was not indigestion...nor a heart attack....but the virus returning. I made him sit up and although he belched quite a bit I made him stay in bed the whole of yesterday as he told me that he had been sweating in the night too! Don't ask. He's had enough indigestion to know what it is but the fear factor and probably the fact that I had returned to work had something to do with it. I'll put it down to him having watched the Indianna Jones movies over the weekend. Far to much imagination and gore to be good for him. Anyway we now have a bottle of heartburn and indigestion relief medication thanks to my rattle around the local Tesco store this morning.

Heidi is still with us...she loves being in the woods, though sometimes takes some persuading to get there. She is however becoming even more incontinent. I keep wishing her better but cannot unsee her losing the use of her back legs at times.

~
What a long post this is turning into...long and boring...you really just want pictures don't you?!
Well here are a few from times recent...

Afternoon tea for one on the patio...