The End of an Era

Not sure how many will have noticed my recent absence from all things blogging.

Well today I return with an explanation...

My beloved dog Heidi failed in the last few weeks and on more than one occasion I nearly made ‘the call’

Sadly on Tuesday morning I had no choice but to do so and then waited until 5:50 when the surgery would be empty to take her in.

The end was beautiful if any end can be. She looked so relaxed and peaceful.

But then I had to leave her. Well her body. I hope her spirit will some day find its way back home to us and can freely roam the lanes and woodland she loved. For Heidi there is no more pain. My heart however feels as though a massive chunk is missing. I am going to work later today and am not sure whether it will be a blessed distraction or not. I shall have to walk one of the residents dogs as I usually do. 

Do we ever really know if our decisions are too soon...we realise if they are too late, but timing such things is painfully tricky. Several nights  I lay awake with tears streaming not knowing quite what to do for the best.

I’m not sure how the gap Heidi has left will or can ever be filled. We do now have two adorable little kittens who came to live with us a week ago. I nearly cancelled them as Heidi was going downhill. However they belonged to a niece who really wanted them to stay in the family. I mustn’t push them aside in my grief for they have done nothing wrong. I’m not yet ready to introduce them to you though.  For now it’s about the memories...the happy times...

Rest in peace my beloved Heidi.

J. x